So the night with the EX was literal Hell. (I should mention that after dinner he headed for the lounge and when SPAM and I said that we didn't want to go, he handed me his car keys and said that he would call when he was done in there--Bastard!) I went to pick him up, in his car which I still had at this point, from the bar around 11pm; he and his friend had obviously had more than a few. After much deliberation they decided to stay the night at the Best Western...I personally would have rather seen them drive off intoxicated to St. Louie and taken their chances. Harsh I know. He asks if I want for him to drop me back off at my room or if I would like to hang out with them for awhile, or even stay the night. Feeling obligated to hang out alittle since I knew all Hell would break loose if I didn't, I ended up staying for a couple of hours while he and his friend continued to drink it up. After having more of the situation than I could take I left...He and I will never be getting back together and he does not have any more power over me.

Now on to Saturday....found out that from the time I send in my application for the Peace Corps until the time I find out if I'm in and placed somewhere will be about 6-9 months. I don't have 6-9 months to be prancing around with nothing to do. Had I of known that the process was so extensive, I would have begun it long ago. Now I'm afraid I'm screwed.

Not only have I had it with the EX, but also with DD and SATAN. I am going to start axing people out of my life. I think that would put an end to alot of this.
I saw DD and HERMAN last night as I was getting out of a car. They were walking towards my dorm and naively I assumed "oh, they must be coming to see SPAM and I!" Wrong. They both waited for me and we walked in together but once we were in the doors, the headed to the second floor. DD left saying "call me sometime..." to which I replied "no, I probably won't." All I ever hear from DD is how I am so mean to him and I never talk to him and wa wa wa....well he consistently treats me like crap. That's why we never worked out the first time. He always waned me around when it was convenient for him. It had little to do with me and how I felt. SPAM said something yesterday which stuck with me...."I'm not going to make someone a priority who always makes me an option." It suits this situation perfectly. All summer DD was all about me...called all the time, tried to get me to come visit him...but right before I left for Africa, when I needed his support the most, he didn't have time for me. Well it doesn't look like he's changed. But I miss him and it sucks.

SATAN called last night and was again a complete moron on the phone. He started up the crap about telling me how hot my friends are and I just hung up on him. I couldn't take it. He called back--idiot--and we continued to talk for a little bit and then he got into this crap about me being mad at him and how he and I need to sit down and talk because apparently I have some issues, implying that I am struggling with our 'relationship.' Totally not true!!! He is not even an issue!!! But there was no convincing him of that. Oh no, weeone apparently can't handle broken relationships......God why????